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「服務他人是你住地球應該付出的租金。」– 穆罕默德‧阿里 (拳擊手)
"Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth." -- Muhammad Ali, Boxer
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英語島Newsletter
天天閱讀英語島,在這裡感知世界,汲取英文的養分。
 

一隻麥克風、一把椅子,單口喜劇 (stand-up comedy) 是近年大受歡迎的喜劇表演型態,充滿地獄笑話,單口喜劇表演者 (stand-up comedian) 把生活抓狂經歷化成一個個厭世笑梗。不只能訓練聽力,還可以學到不少時下字彙、慣用語和需要看場合用的笑話。

Ali Wong 媽媽不是人當的

Ali Wong 從 Netflix 自製 stand-up comedy 脫穎而出,風格辛辣,內容從擇偶、生小孩一路到帶小孩,告訴你當媽媽的內心到底有多崩潰!

擇偶,請下好離手!

同種族在一起的好處
論婚姻,我認為選擇同種族的人挺好的,優點是,你們可以一起在家歧視別人。
I think that for marriage, it can be nice to be with somebody of your own race. The advantage is that you get to go home and be racist together.

選老公是一門投資

我選擇嫁老公因為我想早早退休。我說的「我願意」其實是「老娘不幹了!我不要繼續工作了。」
I chose to marry him on the promise of early retirement, and when I said "I do," what I really meant was, "Oh, I'm done." I'm done. I don't want to work anymore. 

全世界最累人的工作:母親

全職在家當媽很輕鬆?
我曾努力成為全職媽媽,結果我只是喜歡「全職待在家」這個部分。
I tried being a stay-at-home mom, FOR 8 WEEKS. I liked the stay-at-home part. 

生孩子沒什麼好怕的,真正可怕的在後頭

餵母乳是個野人儀式,是在提醒我,我的身體是自助餐廳!
Breastfeeding is a savage ritual, which just reminds you that your body is a cafeteria now! 

餵母乳是因為⋯母乳免錢!

我才不浪費母乳,道理如同:如果你能拉出多汁的漢堡,你還會選擇浪費時間去漢堡店排隊嗎?
If you shit juicy hamburgers, would you ever wait in line at In-N-Out again? 

Trevor Noah 如何升等當黑人

南非長大的 Trevor Noah,到了美國後發現有趣 的文化差異,例如,Trevor 的媽媽是南非黑人、 爸爸是瑞士白人,從小他面臨種族認同,被貼過各式各樣標籤,他找不到屬於混血兒的歸類, 但在美國,他發現只要是成功的混血名人都會自動被歸類成黑人。

你不知道的非洲

非洲的紅綠燈,參考就好
在非洲,紅燈不代表「停!」而是「停?」我懷疑是某個非洲人在環遊世界時發現紅綠燈,把它帶回來,跟大家說「嘿!我們需要這個,擺在十字路口可以增添情調唷!」但其實沒有人知道它的真正用途。
It's almost like an African traveled the world, saw that other people have traffic lights, and then just brought them back but didn't know what they were for. The guy was like, “Guys, guys, guys. We need to get traffic lights. Eh?” People were like, "What for?" "It's for the intersection. It adds atmosphere!" But no one actually knew what it was about. 

黑人認證

成功才有的榮譽認證
在美國,混血兒會被歸類成黑人。但前提要是,你需要超級成功然後受人愛戴。大家原本都叫 我們「混血兒」,但不知道為何變成超級名人後,大家自動把我們升等當「黑人」! 
Mix-race people are categorized as black in America. The only catches are and nobody tells you this: You have to be liked and successful first. Before then, they say you mixed. You achieve success and get upgraded to black. 

膚色不同,玩法也不同

「有色人種限定」的旅遊網

我真的很希望有人可以架設一個有色人種適用的旅遊推薦網站, 因為白人和其他人的旅遊偏好很不同! 
I feel like there should be a TripAdvisor specifically for people of color. Coz white people like different things on vacations than everybody else, right? 

Jen Kirkman 婚姻真實面(我離婚了)

帶著迷人菸嗓的 Jen Kirkman 暢談人生,讓人感覺「生活起來不容易,說起來卻很有趣。」 

JKL 人生哲學

刺青像生小孩,但我刺青,不生小孩
腳上刺青JKL可以解釋成「JK生活」(Jen Kirkman living),或是演員Matthew McConaughey的經典名言「繼 續活下去」(Just keep living)。這句話是真的很激勵人心,雖然我沒有自殺傾向,但出生畢竟不是我能選擇 的,我又很懼怕死亡,人生好難。
It says, "JKL" which stands for JK living, which stands for just keep living, which is Matthew McConaughey's catchphrase. Just keep living ... inspires me. And I'm not suicidal. But I am a soul trapped in a body. I didn't ask to be born, and I'm afraid to die. That's the shit I live in every day.

最抓狂的人生大事

邀請家人來婚禮?為什麼?
我不懂為什麼要列一份清單,上面都是我討厭的人,而且還要邀請他們來參加婚禮。
I don't understand why we need to have family involved. I know that sounds awful, but there's no reason to make a list of people you don't like, and then go, well, “Let's invite them to the wedding.” 

離婚後,人生還是糟透了!

離婚者,請止步! 
離婚之後,朋友不再邀請我參加夫妻聚餐,他們說這樣我不自在,其實,是他們感到不舒服。我可能會像個政治激進份子,拿著宣傳小本本衝進去告訴大家婚姻的真相。
Inviting a divorced woman to a married person's dinner, it's kind of like inviting a political radical to show up. You know what I mean? I might just bust down the door with some pamphlets and start telling the truth about some things, man.


本文摘錄自一張圖搞懂 旅行研究所 2019年04月號
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