商業Email,請不要生意腔!

1. 不要生意腔:可以用We就不要用You
每一封email往來,都是你和與收信人之間的交流。很多人以為寫商業email就應該用「生意腔」,於是把本來有感情基礎的email寫得官樣。

(不好) "Your mail has been received."/"Your complaint is being looked into."

(好)"I have received your mail."/"We are looking into your complaint."

每次email往來不就是跟對方進行了一次交談嗎?只不過是把交談的介面放在email上而已。多用一些簡單明瞭的句子,用我/我們做主詞,這樣才能讓email讀起來熱情、友善,像朋友交談那樣簡單、自然,親切又人性化。

"You" 態度:You will receive your computer by next week. 

"We" 態度:We are happy to have your order. We shipped it by July 21.

 

2. 一針見血:可以清楚就不要模糊
寫email最忌諱文縐縐,要打電話給人就用call,要去拜訪人就說visit,不要用模模糊糊的contact。

模糊:Contact, Soon

明確: call, write, visit, by March 15

 

3. 訊息簡明:可以一個字就不要兩個字
大部份商業人士跟你一樣,每天都要閱讀大量email。所以email一定要寫得簡明扼要。與主題無關或者無助於email的目的內容,請毫不留情的捨棄。

(冗長)The paper jam had the effect of a destructive force on the copy machine.

(精簡)The paper jam destroyed the copy machine.

(冗長)We have enclosed a brochure which shows further details of manufacture.

(精簡)The enclosed brochure shows further manufacture details.

 

4. 語言樸實:用對方看得懂的關鍵字
每個行業都有自己的行話,email溝通時候要確定別人懂不懂你的行話,也儘量不用華麗詞藻。西方的語言習慣,他們更願意使用簡練而樸實的語言;比如:

We look forward to a bright and glorious future of cooperation. 就不如直接寫成:

We hope to have the opportunity to work with you in the future. 

這樣才更加符合西方人的語言習慣。

(迂迴) The choice of exogenous variables in relation to multi-collinearity is contingent upon the

          derivations of certain multiple correlation coefficients. 

(直接) Supply determines demand.

 

5. 有技巧的表達:永遠讓人覺得you're helpful
同樣一件事說法不同,得到回應就不同,有技巧的說法讓人樂於為你效勞。

(拙)Obviously, if you'd read your policy carefully, you'd be able to answer these questions

     yourself. 

(拙)In order to complete the claim you made, simply. . .

(拙)We want to get our check.

(巧)I'm glad to clear up these questions for you.

(巧)To complete your transaction, . . .

(巧)To keep your account in the preferred customer class, please send our check for

      NT$200,000 today.

 

6. 標題就看得出來專不專業
也許很多人都沒有意識到,E-mail的標題是很重要的一個部分,你的郵件給對方的第一個印象就是透過標題來完成的。如果標題沒有內容,看起來像群組垃圾郵件,命運就是直接進入垃圾桶。

(不專業)How are you?

(不專業)Can we work together? 

(專業) Introduction: Our Product Offerings for Bright Ideas Imports.

(專業)Proposal: Bright Ideas Imports-ABC‘s Partnership Opportunity.

收錄於英語島 2015年8月號
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